…faded pink polish
…faded pink polish-
my faded pink polish-
faded black life-
my faded gifted mind-
and deep down she’s so afraid-
and underneath she’s terribly lonely-
but what king would want her,
with faded pink polish?-
but ohh when they were painted-
all ten toes-
flawlessly painted-
she smiled, watching them obsessively-
as she had reached the mold of femininity
in which the world approved-
in which it recognized-
so her head was high when she walked-
as the autism hid behind the glares of pink-
so no one could see it-
while she danced in her womanhood-
with pink polish playing neurotypical tunes-
but then it began to fade-
tho half remained, so she danced, still-
because she still belonged-
femininity had not left her-
traces of pink, still exists-
so she smiled, watching them obsessively;
still-
but soon even more faded-
even more left her-
yet she smiled, while others stared-
as who would understand
this faded pink polish?-
but her home held so much-
but her mind even more -
the autistic mother, raising the autistic child-
isolation masked behind brick walls-
a kind face at war with suicidal thoughts-
with lingering traces of pink-
still clinging to its fade-
just two toes left, the rest bare.
tho continuously she danced-
while streaks of pink still played its neurotypical tune-
still, still, still-
as her mind sought God for survival-
as her soul healed desperately from a past-
so to her you see,
any trace of pink will do-
as the quick peek of its color,
reminds her she’s a woman-
that feminine grace belongs to her;
still-
so let her be,
even in your own lack of understanding-
and don’t be so quick to judge-
just let her hold onto it-
her faded traces of pink-
silly as it may seem-
with only two toes left,
while the rest lay bare-
as she glances down upon them;
while rocking back and forth
in a crowded room-
with faded pink polish-
that’s many months old-
as one souls laughter,
is another souls gold-
that eventually will fade-
that eventually will fade-
that she’ll eventually find the strength
to fully wipe away-
maybe even get redone-
but right now,
let her be-
but right now-
let me cling to it-
this faded polish-
this
beautiful,
feminine,
glorious,
faded
pink
polish-
kb. 🌺
