…but everyday?

…i don’t want to be sad today-

not today-

because i was sad yesterday-

and ill probably be sad tomorrow-

ill just mask it with a smile,

like i always do-

its so exhausting-

im taking my antidepressants-

are they not working?

was i born broken?

i would give so much to feel normal-

because who actually wants to hear someone’s sad every single day?

i mean let’s be real-

and who would actually understand that?

i literally spend my days emotionally fighting to reach the next one-

making sure my voice has a happy pitch when talking to my children; when answering the phone-

my emojis are always happy or laughing faces- they always convince someone you’re ok-

my kids are safe-

shouldn’t that be enough?

i hope the monster never catches them-

what is wrong with me?

i get being sad sometimes-

but everyday?

every.

day.

why me father?-

why me?…

kb